EBC Presents the GOP Beard Auction

Tonight, tonight, tonight. For one night only, razors will fly, scissors will cut, hair wax will be employed, prides will be shattered and many an embarassing beard will be born from the ashes of a formerly dashing squadron of men. Tonight, the Embarrrassing Beards Club - Carleton Chapter presents for you, a chance to craft a truly horrendous beard from a once great one, or for current EBC members, to try to make it slightly more embarrassing or generally leave it the same. Regardless, tall buildings of the beard world will come crashing down tonight, and on top of the wreckage, bullhorn in hand, EBC will herald in a scraggly new era.

GOP Beard Auction

Tonight (Friday 1/30)

Sevy Tea Room

9:30 til the last shred of dignity makes its exit.

What makes an embarrassing beard? No one knows for certain. Beard experts, such as this guy...


...agree that while an embarrassing beard can be seen on your face, it truly resides in your heart.

But recognizing the heart of someone with an embarrassing beard takes years of practice and a lifetime subscription to Atlantic Monthly, so most of us just have to rely on visual clues.

Perhaps its the strange color difference between your eyebrows and your inadequate goatee. Perhaps it is the slightly haughty upward curve of your all-to-sparse moustachio.

Here are a couple of real-life examples to guide you (Click to enlarge).